A Friendly Message

[Lenny]

Dear friends,

In the interest of peace and harmony among the brethern, posts that tend to cause factions and division here will need to be deleted. The recent issue between a few of us was already resolved and there was no need to respond with hostile comebacks that only tend to revive the bad feelings that such posts cause. Therefore, I regrettably felt it necessary to delete a few posts on that thread and ask that the posters not be offended by this.

I love posting my spiritual convictions but as we saw in the past, they caused arguments, division and factions so as you can see, I have not posted on religion or responded to posts that I normally would respond to regarding religion or politics in a long time and everything has been cool on the Candy Store.

I am asking that you also restrain yourselves from posting in a manner that would cause hard feelings, arguments, dissension, disharmony and hostilities here on the Candy Store. I was once a part of that kind of posting and saw the harm it did and stopped. If I can do it, then so can everyone. Let's leave that stuff to the Bronxboard and Back In The Bronx message board. We are the Bronx Candy Store and many of us left those other boards to get away from that.

While I do not take pleasure in censoring or deleting posts and have not done so in the past, it appears that it becomes necessary from time to time to delete a post or reply that tends to artificially resuscitate or prolong a thread which seems to be heading nowhere in being resolved and exposing other members to hostilities, not to push my weight around as moderator of the Candy Store, but in the interest of peace and harmony among friends. My pledge to you is to develop a skill to use discretion in determining what posts need to be deleted so that I do not come off as letting my position as Moderator run to my head. Please know that I do not take this matter lightly and wish it were not necessary at all, but although it is not a popular position to be in as Moderator, if it means keeping anyone from being offended by a hostile post and feeling that they need to leave, whereby losing a member, then someone needs to do it and I guess that's me.

Let's manifest the meaning of the Christmas season.....

"PEACE ON EARTH...GOODWILL TOWARD MEN"

In Friendship
Lenny

[adkbarbara]

Lenny

Do what you feel is right.

I love this board and have been a member since Tony put it all together. Keep the peace

Tiger

[Deleted]

Thank you Lenny!

[CQuinn]

Lenny,

You have the audacity to remove my post and leave Lou's response....now, that surely is unfair. Enjoy the Board with your selected fiends.

[Fran Gyomory]

Somehow I expected this. You can't simply delete at will, your own will. This is no longer the BCS. It is becoming the BB because the moderator can now decide what he determines is unacceptable. I find this unacceptable.

[Fran Gyomory]

By the way Lenny, this is far from a friendly message.

[Lenny]

Again, I chose to delete the posts or replies that were hostile to another member. I found Charlie and Jimmy's posts to be hostile toward Lou while Lou's explanation for returning to the Candy Store was done tastefully and with diplomacy without resorting to hostility.

I also said that the job of the Moderator was not a popular one when it comes to making decisions as to whether or not to delete certain posts and I accept that as part of the job and its consequences.

In a previous post at an earlier time, Tony made it quite clear that such posts would be deleted from now on. Out of respect for our founder, there was no need to further aggravate the issue with nasty replies and the matter should have been considered over and done with after Tony gave the guidlines.

I am sorry that some of you take offense at my deleting those offensive posts however, somebody has to do it and I believe my "Friendly Message" spoke to the issue with respect and consideration for everyone as the Moderator. I did my best to determine with fairness what posts to delete and in the best interest of the Candy Store as a whole. It's not a matter of being the Gastapo but rather, doing what is necessary to keep the peace among the members and ensuring that all posts that are made are respectful toward all members. That's what keeps us separate and distinct from the other message boards.

P.S. Fran.....I took great care in the wording of my "Friendly Message." I read your reply to it and I read my message over and over again to see what anyone could have possibly found offensive and I could not find anything.

I wonder if any other members read my "Friendly Message" and saw anything offensive about it. If the majority of members feel my message was offensive, I will delete it as I would any other offensive post.

I understand that there are some people in society who despise anyone who exercises authority and calls the shots for others. They wouldn't step up to the plate and take such positions and they have nothing but disdain for those who do. The fact is....someone has to do it and I stepped up to the plate. Hopefully, as in the past................this too shall pass!

[Fran Gyomory]

What I find offensive is the fact that only you will determine what is offensive. That is a dictatorship and not a free society which was the foundaton of this web site. I find it offensive and unacceptable that you are now judge and jury on what is offensive and what is not.

[CQuinn]

Lenny,

This is my last post on this subject:

You state:
"Lou's explanation for returning to the Candy Store was done tastefully and with diplomacy without resorting to hostility."

If you think stating that he will continue to respond to any post using snopes, etc. as he did in the past is not hostile after someone objected to it...diplomatic would be I don't mean to offend anyone; but, that's how I repond and will continue to do so.

[Lenny]

Those who wish to be hostile toward one another will need to use e-mail and not the Candy Store, whereby exposing everyone else to these childish and sensless arguments.

As I explained, it is the Moderators job to make the determination as to what gets deleted. I have promised to do so in a fair and equitable manner and hopefully it won't even be necessary to delete anymore postings as long as everyone respects everyone else without resorting to name calling and hostilities.

I don't like it, I hate doing it, but someone has to do it in the interest of peace and harmony. It has nothing to do with dictatorship.

I can't think of a better way to explain what I do and why I do it. It seems there is no way to please everyone 100 % but I'll keep trying. Hopefully this will pass and we can get on with it!

[marylou]

Oy, like there's not enough stress and dissention in our everyday lives and now we have to have 'cyber arguments' with people who have come together on this board because of common interests and a sense of humor? Every group, every government, every organization etc. etc. has to have leaders and some guidelines. Lenny, in my opinion, do what you must, that's the job of the moderator. If, sometime in the future, any of my posts cross the line in your opinion, or Tony's or whoever is in charge, I'll respect the decision.

[Lenny]

Well said Mary Lou! Let's hope after a cool-down period that others will adapt to that productive line of thinking.

[Deleted]

I FOUND LOUS RESPONSE WHEN HE CAME BACK OFFENSIVE.

SO HOW WAS MY ANSWER TO HIS POST OFFENSIVE OR NASTY.
WE ARE BIG BOYS AND GIRLS AND WE CERTAINLY DIDNT NEED FOR YOU TO STEP IN AND DELETE PERFECTLY CIVIL RESPONSES TO LOUS COMING BACK STATEMENT, AND THEN YOU LEFT HIS RESPONSE ON BOARD.

THIS IS PLAYING FAVORITES.

IF YOU WANTED ME TO LEAVE YOU COULD OF ASKED ME.
IVE BEEN ON THIS BOARD SINCE THE BEGINNING AND I FEEL LIKE I WAS THROWN TO THE DOGS NOT ONCE BUT BEFORE WHEN SOMEONES NASTY POST WAS DELETED. WELL MY POST CERTAINLY WASNT NASTY, I THOUGHT IT WAS TWO MEN TALKING ABOUT A DISAGREEMENT.

ITS BEEN NICE .

JEANNIE AND I WISH YOU ALL A MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY CHANUKKAH.


TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES.
GOD BLESS YOU ALL.

JIMMY AND JEANNIE

[Joan]

I think that what Lenny posted was very well done. He is the moderator and we must respect what he thinks should or should not stay on the BCS!

We don't want this Board to wind up like the Bronxboard where there is alot of criticism and not appropriate posts.

I will respect what Lenny decides to stay or go!

[adkbarbara]

I agree with you Joan Lenny & Tony says what stays and goes

Tiger

[Fran Gyomory]

I don't agree with any type censorship especially when one person has the control. I won't agree with it ever so don't expect me to "cool off" because I won't. I won't walk away from the BCS because I like most of the people with few exceptions. I have a right to voice my opinion and everyone has a right t ignore my opinion but no on has the right to censor my opinion. Not yet in this great country where men and women have died to ensure my right to free speech.

I don't like people second guessing me but they have their right to do what they want.

Don't infringe on my rights to play kissy face with someone else!

[Barry]

I didn't respond to Jimmy and Lou's little spat or comment on Lou's threat to leave and Charlie's responce on Lou's return because it was none of my business. Bye the way I found none of it as being offensive but more of a p**sing match. That being said deleting posts have now caused a little controversy. I think if nothing were done it would have blown over and gone away

[Deleted]

adkbarbara said:

I agree with you Joan Lenny & Tony says what stays and goes

Tiger

Yes!

[Deleted]

(wouldve hoped it wouldve been up a little bit longer LOL)

[LENNY]

I hav e a fast trigger (delete) finger.

[Deleted]

Impressive my friend...

[Lenny]

What is said is said and what is done is done. I have done nothing wrong and have acted in accordance with the guidelines set forth by our administrator.

I promise not to be an axe man when it comes to deleting posts. Only those posts that are hostile and contain name calling or are belittling to other members will be deleted.

I do not intend to infringe on anyone's right to post on any particular subject. Everyone is free to post what they want as a matter of freedom of speech. However, when the replies come in and call names and belittle others simply because the poster does not agree with their opinion, this is when I must exercise my responsibility to put a stop to it.

As Moderator, the buck has to stop somewhere and that somewhere is at my desk. I am sorry that this has been miscontrued as censorship or an infringement on freedom of speech. Again, only posts that call names and are disrespectful toward other members will be deleted.

I can't believe this has become such an issue. Other than Tony deleting a post last week and my deletion today, there has never been deleting here at the Candy Store. It's all over this one issue and one thread, yet there are those who would turn the Candy Store totally upside down and make the administrator and myself into ogre's for exercising a little control over inappropriate posts.

When Tony deleted some posts last week, no body questioned it. The moderator comes back on line and found it necessary to delete the same kind of inappropriate postings that Tony deleted and World War III starts. Why is that?

Why didn't Fran, Charlie and Jimmy object to Tony deleting their posts? That was only one person deciding what posts stayed and what posts were deleted. It's no different when I decide as Moderator what posts to delete.

Like I said, I have no intention of allowing deletions to become a daily occurance unless someone posts something that makes it necessary.

Please let this issue come to rest now. It is what it is......INANE!

[Deleted]

when you have a group of people together all giving there opinion, there is always going to be conflict, it is always good to have someone that can keep the peace. that is what lenny is doing as a mediator, i am sure he does not like to delete anyones post, and of course everyone is going to get upset about that, but that is what he has to do to keep this place a happy place to come to. otherwise there could be alot of conflict on here. if it was my post that had got deleted, yeah it would bother me, but what the hell i will get over it and move on to my next post. it is a waist of time to sit and fight over it. because no matter how you look at it, there job is to keep peace.

[LENNY]

Lenny and Sue,

Well said!
Thank you.